My Inspirations · Photography · Writing Prompts

Bachpan



Masoomiyat ne Bachpan se pucha- Nanhe munne bacche teri muthi main kya hai?


Wo chup raha, thodi der main uske kaan main bola- Aye masoomiyat, tu chale ja, malik ne dekh liya toh bahut maarega…

Please watch- The Price Of Free– A powerful documentary on the life and work of 2014 Nobel Laureate – Kailash Satyarthi

Credits:

https://priceoffree.com/

https://www.youtube.com/soulpancake

Hindi Poetry · My Inspirations

कोई खतरा नहीं- ओमप्रकाश वाल्मीकि

शहर की सड़कों पर
दौड़ती-भागती गाड़ियों के शोर में
सुनाई नहीं पड़ती सिसकियाँ
बोझ से दबे आदमी की

जो हर बार फँस जाता है
मुखौटों के भ्रमजाल में
जानते हुए भी कि उसकी पदचाप
रह जाएगी अनचीन्ही

नहीं आएगा उसके हिस्से
समन्दर की रेत में पड़ा सीपी का मोती
लहरें नहीं धोएँगी पाँव
हवाएँ भी निकल जाएँगी
अजनबी बनकर

फिर भी वह देखता है
टकटकी लगाए
भीड़ के सैलाब को
मुश्किल होता है
चेहरों को पहचान लेना

घोषणा होती हैं
अन्तर्राष्ट्रीय मंच से —
‘नस्ल और जाति का प्रश्न हल करना है
मानव विकास के लिए’

चुप्पी साध लेती है दिल्ली
ख़ामोश हो जाते हैं गलियारे
संसद के गलियारे
राष्ट्रपति भवन की दीवारें
और धार्मिक पण्डे

आवाज़ें फुसफुसाती हैं —
‘नस्ल और जाति जैसी
कोई अवधारणा नहीं है
हमारी महान संस्कृति में’

चारों ओर ख़ामोशियों का घना अरण्य
उग आता है
खड़ी हो जाती है
रास्ता रोककर कँटीली बाड़
महान सभ्यता की चिन्ता में

शामिल हो जाते हैं
पेड़-पौधे, पशु-पक्षी
पर्यावरण पर बोलना और सोचना
कितना आसान होता है
नहीं रहता कोई ख़तरा

न धर्म-विरोधी होने का डर
न साप्रदायिकता का भय
नहीं आएगा डराने-धमकाने
कोई दल
आदि देवता का अस्त्र हाथ में लेकर
संस्कृति भी बची रह जाएगी

वैसे भी संस्कृति अक्सर चुप ही रहती है
उस वक़्त जब चीख़ते हैं
बेलछी, कफल्टा, पारस बिगहा,
नारायणपुर, साँढूपुर,
मिनाक्षीपुरम, झज्जर-दुलीना
और गोधरा-गुजरात…

संस्कृति और धर्म जश्न मनाते हैं
जब सिसकता है आदमी
आग में झुलसकर
सड़क पर बिखरी लाशें
सड़ने लगती हैं
जिनकी शिनाख़्त करने
कोई नहीं आता

जो भी आएगा
फोड़ दी जाएँगी उसकी आँखें
या फिर कर दिया जायएगा घोषित
राष्ट्र-विरोधी

घोषणा होती है —
खिड़की दरवाज़े बन्द कर लो
महाराजा विक्रमादित्य की सवारी
आने वाली है

सड़कों पर सुनाई पड़ती है
क़दमताल करते बूटों की ध्वनि
हवा में तैरती है बारूदी गन्ध

चुनाव होते हैं हर बार
सभ्य नागरिक निकल पड़ते हैं
संसद और विधानसभाओं की ओर
बिना असलाह के

भूख और मौत से भयभीत आदमी
नहीं जानता
यह सब क्यों होता है
इतनी जल्दी-जल्दी

क्यों गिने जाते हैं
जातियों के सिर
चुनाव के दिनों में
बड़े से बड़ा नेता खड़ा होता है
जाति की जनगणना के बाद ही

यह अलग बात है
सब मौन रहते हैं
‘डरबन’ की घोषणा पर
पड़ोसी देश का राजा
परिक्रमा करता है मन्दिर की
चढ़ाता है बलि भैंसे की

और,
पशु-पक्षियों के हितैषी
निकल जाते हैं टूर पर
देश से बाहर

या फिर किसी तहख़ाने में बैठकर
देख-सुन रहे होते हैं प्रवचन
लखटकिया सन्तों का
सवाल रहते हैं स़िर्फ सवाल
जिनके उत्तर ढूँढ़ना ज़रूरी नहीं है

सभ्य नागरिकों के लिए
‘कहीं’ कोई खतरा नहीं है
मामला धर्म का है
चुप रहने में ही भला है’ —

सलाह देकर निकल जाता है
राष्ट्रीय अख़बार का सम्पादक
चमचमाती गाड़ी में

मैं देख रहा हूं वह सब जिसे देखना जुर्म है
फिर भी करता हूँ गुस्ताखी
चाहो तो मुझे भी मार डालो
वैसे ही जैसे मार डाला एक प्यासे को
जिसने कोशिश की थी
एक अँजुली जल पीने की

उस तालाब का पानी
जिसे पी सकते हैं कुत्ते-बिल्ली
गाय-भैंसेंं
नहीं पी सकता एक दलित
दलित होना अपराध है उनके लिए

जिन्हें गर्व है संस्कृति पर
वह उतना ही बड़ा सच है
जितना उसे नकराते हैं
एक साज़िश है
जो तब्दील हो रही है
स्याह रंग में
जिसे अन्धेरा कहकर
आँख मून्द लेना काफ़ी नहीं है !

Hindi Poetry

ओ नारी—समता की सहपाठी हो तुम!

ओ नारी—
समता की सहपाठी हो तुम!
अनेक महान सम्बोधन दिये तुम्हें 
पर दिया नहीं
तुम्हें निर्णय का अधिकार
तुम्हें रिश्ते-नातों श्रृंखला से जकड़ा—
शस्त्र और शास्त्र का भय दिखलाकर

जो पाँव तुम्हारे साथ चलने की खाते हैं क़सम
वे ही तुम्हें ठुकराते
जो हाथ तुम्हारा हाथ थामते
वे ही गला दबाते
फिर भी ओ नारी
अनन्त विसंगतियों-विकृतियों के बीच
पत्थर पर उगती—
दूब-सी उगती रही हो तुम!

Credits: kavitakosh.org

Hindi Poetry · Writing Prompts

Adhuri Kavita

Dil tehal raha tha
Tanhai ke veeraane main
Tabhi usse ek phool dikha
Phool jismein teri mehak thi
Uss mehak ko jab andar khincha tab
Titliyaan jo so gayi thi,
Phir uchal khud karne lagi
Dil ke pass aayi aur phool par baith gayi
Honthon ne aadha chaand banaya
Aankhon ki chamak se sooraj sharmaya…
Teri mehak ne hi itna kuch kar diya,
Ab tu bhi aaja saamne,
Tere bina…
Yeh kavita abhi adhuri si lagti hai…
Hindi Poetry

Thik Karein Hum

Aa ek dusre ko thik karein hum
Thodi dosti se, thode pyaar se…
Aa ek dusre ko thik karein hum
Thoda dil se, thoda dimaag se…
Aa ek dusre ko thik karein hum
Thoda Dhoop se, thoda chaanv se…
Aa ek dusre ko thik karein hum
Thoda hansi se, thoda aansoon se…
Aa ek dusre ko thik karein hum
Thoda kal se, thoda aaj se…
Aa ek dusre ko Insaan karein hum
Chupte hue andar ke shaitaan se…
Writing Prompts

Hey…

I can talk to trees for hours

I can hold a roundtable with dogs

I can solve an argument of bees

Buzzing around sunflowers

I can converse with a sexist rickshaw driver in his dialect

I can sing ‘Afreen Afreen’ with a taxi driver who has 5 grandchildren

I can talk to Gulzar sahaab after being a bit starstruck

I can debate with Arnab (PS: If he is sleeping)

I can fight with bhakts

I can intellectually masturbate with pseudo-intellectuals

I can hold a seminar for pseudo feminists

I can stand in front of 444444444 people after a normal panic attack

But your ‘Hey’ with three ellipses

Sends all the shivers possible down my spine…

My Inspirations

If World Loses Its Heart

If world loses its light
What will I do with morning
What will I do with summer
I will retreat in you
If world loses its colour
What will I do with dusk
What will I do with spring
I will mix with you
If world loses its melody
What will I do with raindrops
What will I do with lullabies
I will take birth out of you
If world loses its heart
What will I do with pain
What will I do with compassion
I will get free from you…

(Excerpt from the movie – Season Of The Devil by Lav Diaz)

English Poetry

Fireballs

You know what,
You are a beautiful battlefield
Wake up today
Look yourself in the mirror
Look carefully
Look in those eyes
Look till they turn into fireballs
Fireballs that dreams have ignited in your soul
Fireballs that good vibes have ignited in your heart
Now consider these fireballs as your guide
And light up your path…
Good Morning
My Inspirations

Happy Diwali

 

हमें अदाएं दिवाली की ज़ोर
भाती हैं I कि लाखों झमकें हर एक घर में जगमगाती हैं II
चिराग जलते हैं और लौयें
झिलमिलाती हैं I मकां मकां में बहारें ही झमझमाती हैं II
खिलौने नाचें हैं तस्वीरें
गत बजाती हैं I बताशे हँसते हैं और खीलें खिल खिलाती हैं II1
गुलाबी बर्फियों के मुहँ
चमकते फिरते हैं, जलेबियों के भी पहिये ढुलकते फिरते हैं II
हर एक दांत से पेड़े अटकते
फिरते हैं I इमरती उछले है लड्डू ढुलकते फिरते हैं II
खिलौने नाचें हैं तस्वीरें
गत बजाती हैं I बताशे हँसते हैं और खीलें खिल खिलाती हैं II 2
अटारी छज्जे दरो बाम पर
बहाली है I दीवार एक नहीं लीपने से खाली है II
जिधर को देखो उधर रोशनी उजाली है I गरज़
में क्या कहूं ईंट ईंट पर दिवाली है II
खिलौने नाचें हैं तस्वीरें गत बजाती हैं I बताशे
हँसते हैं और खीलें खिल खिलाती हैं II 3

                                                                                                                                                –  नज़ीर अकबराबादी 

Writing Prompts

The 2:37A.M. Brawl

It’s 2:37 A.M., just about the time when an enemy called self doubt walks into my heart to brawl the fighter within me

I pick up my phone, go on YouTube and type,

‘Muhammad Ali- The Greatest’ and as soon as he says,

‘I will show you how great I am…’ looking into the eye of his opponent,

The fighter within me gets back on his feet and knocks down the self doubt at one go,

And I wake up as a winner the next morning…

All thanks to
The Greatest

Muhammad Ali

English Poetry

Letters to Self #2 (Learn)

Learn
Learn every moment, Learn every day
Learn from your Dad, Learn from your Mom
Learn to walk, Learn to fly
Learn how to turn each walk into flight
Learn
Learn every moment, Learn every day
Learn goodness, Learn evil
Learn how to turn evil into goodness
Learn to love, Learn to hate
Learn how to turn hatered into love
Learn
Learn every moment, Learn every day
Learn how to change yourself for good
Learn everything you could
Learn from a mate, Learn from a stranger
Learn how to turn a stranger into a mate
Learn
Learn every moment, Learn every day
Learn from happiness, Learn from sadness
Learn how to turn sadness into happiness
Learn from the sun, Learn from the moon
Learn how to become both Sun and Moon
Learn
Learn every moment, Learn every day
You are a student, Life is a school,
Thus, Learn.
Hindi Poetry

Ek khat khudko (Seekh)

Seekh
Pal pal seekh, Din din seekh
Papa se seekh, Mummy se seekh
Chalna seekh, Uthna seekh
Dada se seekh, Nani se seekh
Nani ki kahaaniyon se seekh
Dada ki jawaaniyon se seekh
Pal pal seekh, Din din seekh
Accha seekh, Bura seekh
Bure ko Acche main badalna seekh
Pyaar se seekh, Nafrat se seekh
Nafrat ko Pyaar main badalna seekh
Pal pal seekh, Din din seekh
Seekh ke khud ko badalna seekh
Khud se sab kuch karna seekh
Dost se seekh, Ajnabi se seekh
Ajnabi ko dost main badalna seekh
Pal pal seekh, Din Din seekh
Khushi se seekh, Aansoon se seekh
Aansoon ko Khushi main badalna seekh
Sooraj se seekh, Chaand se seekh
Sooraj aur Chaand dono banna seekh
Pal pal seekh, Din din seekh
Insaan hi hai na,
Tu bas seekh…
My Inspirations

हिन्दू या मुस्लिम के अहसासात को मत छेड़िये

हिन्दू या मुस्लिम के अहसासात को मत छेड़िये
अपनी कुरसी के लिए जज्बात को मत छेड़िये
हममें कोई हूण, कोई शक, कोई मंगोल है
दफ़्न है जो बात, अब उस बात को मत छेड़िये
ग़र ग़लतियाँ बाबर की थीं; जुम्मन का घर फिर क्यों जले
ऐसे नाजुक वक्त में हालात को मत छेड़िये
हैं कहाँ हिटलर, हलाकू, जार या चंगेज़ ख़ाँ
मिट गये सब, क़ौम की औक़ात को मत छेड़िये
छेड़िये इक जंग, मिल-जुल कर गरीबी के ख़िलाफ़
दोस्त, मेरे मजहबी नग्मात को मत छेड़िये

अदम गोंडवी

Uncategorized

The Eternal Conflict

मूर्ति के चार टुकड़ों से निकलकर पूरी दुनिया पे छाओ,

भगवान हो यार थोड़ा वैसा बनके दिखाओ…

तू अगर चाहे तो मूर्ति में भी दिख जायेगा वो,

तेरे अंदर भी वो है, तेरे बाहर भी वो…

Uncategorized

Aatma Ki Lau

Ek kanpkapi hai mere andar, jo bahaar aane ko hamesha taiyaar rehti hai

Chaar Sau ho ya Chaalis kitne bhi log ho mere saamne,

Wo daayein pair tak apna rasta khoj hi leti hai

Shabdon pe taala laga deti hai,

Gale se paani sukha kar peshaani pe le aati hai

Shareer dheere dheere thanda padne lagta hai

Thik ussi waqt aatma main ek lau jalti hai,

Yeh lau shareer main aaye toofan se ladti hai

Aur shabdon ke taale ko pighaal deti hai

Peshaani ka paani udd jaata hai

Gale main pighaala hua woh rass pahunch jaata hai

Daayein pair ki kanpkapi tham jaati hai

Aur aatma ek baar phir yeh yudh jeet jaati hai…

 

My Inspirations

Ghar Ke Buzurg

Train ka coach jab purana ho jata tha toh usse yard main shift kar dete the… Aur woh wahaan khade khade din raat dusri trains ko apne aage nikalte hue dekhta tha…

Par jab hum usmein luka chuppi khelne jaate the, tab usmein bahut si aisi cheezein milti thi jinka koi mol nahi laga sakte the, jaise puraani kitaabein, checks waale muffler aur kabhi kabhi toh paanch rupaye ke note… Un cheezon ko paakar chehre pe ek alag hi muskaan aa jaati hai…

Yeh coach ghar ke buzurgon ki yaad dilaate hain…

(Excerpt from Nirmal Verma’s -Antim Aranya)

Hindi Poetry

Ghar Ki Subah

Iss Kavita se mere ghar ke savere ki gandh aayegi!
Subah savere jab pheli baar Papa uthaane aate hain
Toh unki chillahat ke saath main ek sugandh shaving cream ki aati hai
Jo ‘5 minute aur’ ka bahana sunkar kam hone lagti hai…
Phir neeche jab aata hu,
Tab brush se phele aa rahi khud ke moonh ki durgandh
Mandir se aayi Maa se aa rahi chandan ki khushboo se ladne lagti hai…
Phir Dadaji ke pass jab pranaam karne jata hu
Toh wahaan garam chai ki khushboo
Akhbaar ke baasi propaganda se ladti hai
Iss yudh par alpviram Dadaji ki paad hi lagaati hai…
Phir 100 kadam tehal ke bathroom ki aur wo jab prasthan karte hain
Main mauka dekh kar Sports ka panna nikaal leta hu,
Aur kitchen se aa rahi Jalebi Pohe (because stereotype) ki khushboo ki taraf khicha chala jata hu
Par jab wahaan pahunchta hu toh apne liye bas gandh rahit Green Tea hi pata hu…
Aur Communist Pait kab Capitalist tond ban gayi iske flashback main chala jata hu
Kuch aise katt jaati thi ghar ki subah
Par kya ab Naye sheher ki nayi subah, nayi hawa jab laayegi…
Kya woh apne saath wohi sugandh jise kehta hu main ghar apne saath la payegi…
Uncategorized

Letters To Self #1

Hi you ‘Like’ freak

Suffering from a social media disorder

Running after likes and responses on the Internet to feel good about yourself

You are a hypocrite

Not to the outside world but to yourself

For the first twenty years of your life you have swam through seas of pity

Never realising that it was full of plastic

You were born premature, so what

What’s the big deal, it is upon you to fix it

But what you did

You started using the pity as a mental crutch

And that is the worst thing a person can do to himself

You found a thing which you were half decent at

That is WRITING

Putting words one after the other

To make sense of it all

But were you able to

Nobody is

Then came the social media monster

Where you tried to do away with pity

But you forgot to take care of your own self

Of your own health

You started getting distracted from the real problems

This started the tug of war

With you limping in the middle

On one side ignorance and self pity of the real world was pulling you

But you wanted to go on the other side which comprised of validation from people behind keyboards

But when they weren’t able to help

You complained in the real world

Complained that world is trying to undermine you

But this whole time, the only person undermining you was you

You cared less and less about your real problems

Your health, your leg, your hand, your life

And when they weren’t fixed

You committed another mistake

You made yourself small in your own damn mind

And expected others to feel otherwise

And accept you as this confident and intellectual person

Just because you shared something funny on their Social media walls

Dude please

First accept yourself

Start working on yourself

Stop pitying yourself

Fix your damn leg, hand, health and life

Throw the mental crutches of pity

Always remember with every second you are getting closer to death

You are losing out on life

And every second you pity yourself

You are not loving yourself

And that’s a moment wasted

Remember, only you that can love you till the end of your life

Please do that

Remind yourself that

Again and again

You don’t need validation of tapping fingers on gorilla glass screens to feel good about yourself

You need yourself to take care of yourself

And a glass in front of you where you can stand and say ‘I love myself’.

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Patriarchy, Screw You!!!

Patriarchy, you know what Screw You!!!

For not letting me cry my heart out…

Patriarchy, Screw You!!!

For giving me a power that I cannot handle by birth

Patriarchy, Screw You!!!

For not letting me get close to my father

Patriarchy, Screw You!!!

For the exorbitant bills of therapy

And last but not the least,

Patriarchy, Screw You !!!

For being the root cause of pseudo-feminism…

Patriarchy, you know what Screw You!!!

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Laar

Laar
Tap tap tap tap tapke laar
Iske hain chaar prakaar
Bhook ki laar
Tharak ki laar
Paise ki laar
Power ki laar
Tap tap tap tap
Tapke laar…
Bhook ki laar hai sabse basic yaar,
Phir bhi usse rokne ke liye
Kitno ko pochni padti hai dusron ki tharak ki laar
Tap tap tap tap
Tapke laar
Tharak ki laar,
Hai khoob kamaal,
Arey bhai usse hi toh hai yeh saara sansaar
Par jab ban jaat wo vyapaar aur
Usmein mila nahi pyaar ka swaad
Tab bann jati yeh bahut khatarnaak
Tap tap tap tap
Tapke laar
Paise ki laar bhi badi zaroori hai yaar,
Usse chalta hai aaj ka sansaar
Par agar ismein bhi nahi aaya pyaar ka swaad
Toh tabaahi machata hai yeh baraambar
Tap tap tap tap
Tapke laar
Phir jiski tapke power ki laar,
Uske hain bas do kaam
Ya toh badhata hai apni bhook,tharak aur paise ki laar
Aur maarta phirta hai ahankaar ki paad
Nahi toh gatak leta hai janta ka pyaar
Aur leta hai sukoon ki dakaar
Tap tap tap tap
Tapke laar…
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Udhaar Ke Sher

Log toot jaate hain EMI chukaane main,

Tum zara nahi taras khaate yun bhag jaane main.

Baarish ki ek boond ko taras gaya wo,

Boodein jab chalki, apni bitiya ke saamne latak raha tha wo.

Usne calander banaye, jaam chalkaaye,

Na jaane kin kin nashon se loan pass karwaaye

Zameen girvi rakhi thi banno ki Shaadi main,

Dheere dheere pura parivaar bik gaya kundli ka dosh hataane main.

Iss beech ek akhbaar uthata hai ek insaan,

Thoda bulbulata hai, thoda taras khata hai… phir kehta hai, mera ho gaya…main middle class.

Note: First Sher is copied from Bashir Badr Sahaab’s sher.

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Kahaan Reh Gaye The

Bhag gaya tha woh apne gaanv ko paraya samajhkar,

Ab maara maara phirta hai parayon ko apna samajhkar.

 

Badi badi imaaraton ne moh liya tha uska mann,

Phir kyun baar baar yaad karta tha nadi kinaare waala bachpan.

 

Mashoori ki chaahat main dhal gayi jawaani,

Shaurat jisne dilayi wo thi Nani ki kahaani.

 

Tehzeeb jab apne gaanv ki bachon ko sikhlayi,

Unhe yeh lecturebaazi raas na aayi.

 

Budhape ke station se jab waapas gaanv ka rukh kiya,

‘Arey kahaan reh gaye the bhaiya’, yeh bolkar gaanv ne swaagat kiya.

 

 

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Love and Religion

Everybody knows which one is  the greater entity between Love and Religion. But often when they are at war, the lesser one wins and Humanity loses.

Well to put in simpler terms, the ultimate goal of religion is to fall in love with God and the ultimate goal of love is well, to fall in love. This means that religion is born out of love. Then why religion is so arrogant and love is full of fears. Why does Religion is on sale at places of worship and love meets secretly in these places. See, one thing is certain, Love with all its complexities is difficult to understand. Period. That’s why our ancestors might have thought let’s create a means to flirt with God, if we can’t fall in love with the Almighty. So, religion was invented as a means to flirt with God. Now, because there are a thousand ways to flirt, so we have thousands of religions. Each one tutoring us about the best way to flirt with God. But none of them teaches us love, because you can learn about love only by falling in love.

Due to simplicity and a very good marketing strategy fuelled by fear, over the years Religion has become very popular, so it is natural for it to grow arrogant and powerful. It uses this power to brainwash us and stay away from Love. This is the how the enterprise called Religion functions. When our soul begins to dry up due to lack of love, Religion loans us an opportunity to flirt with God and keeps us indebted till we wither away.

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Prem Aur Ishq

Tujhe Allah ne banaya hai,

Mujhe bhagwaan ne banaya hai,

Prem bhagwaan ne banaya hai,

Ishq Allah ne banaya hai,

Par yeh nahi pata hum dono ko kisne milaya hai…

Maine apni prathna ki,

Tumne apni ibadat

Par yeh nahi pata kismein thi zyada taaqat

Shayad yeh Bhagwaan aur Allah ki mili bhagat ka natija hai

Aisi mili bhagat jisse aam log toh kya Sarkarein bhi darr jaati hain

Daraar daalne ke liye jo kya kuch nahi kar jaati hain

Par khair Sarkarein badalti rahengi

Subsidy ghatti badhti rahengi

Par humein usse farak kya padna hai

Teri aankhon main mere prem ka maansarovar jhalkta hai

Aur meri aankhon main tere ishq ka haji basta hai

English Poetry · Uncategorized

Stage Fright

My right leg is shaking,
Shaking as though it is the epicentre of my nervousness
Eyes don’t know where to look,
Palms don’t know how much to leak
As thousand hypothetical judgements travel through the air
to lend me my first attack of stage fright
Well…last night in front of the mirror it was all fine,
Three strong points to support my argument
which even Frank Underwood cannot overpower and I am done
Daydreaming in the night
Ohh…I am Hitler, I am Gandhi, I am one of a kind
But that was last night…and to be fair to my introverted-ness
I was two drinks down
But now, as it has attacked me
As I am thrown in the middle of this battleground
I begin with my first argument but suddenly my head switches to Dothraki
With a bunch of uhhs and ahhs in my mouth
I am cursing the teacher who advised me to get on stage
I am cursing myself for showing up today
The only things debating right now are two wills
Will to express or the Will to go back
As this tug of war rages in my head
Heart pounds a million every minute
A look of my friend calms me down
He signals me from the audience to look at him
And nowhere else
Ohh that funny faced bastard
It’s like looking at the mirror yet again
And now words come walking back to my brain
Only to find out they’re too late
It’s already three minutes now
But it’s a great start

Isn’t it? I will be better the next time around

Thank you!

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‘Pyaar’ Ka Ek Khat ‘Nafrat’ Ke Naam

Dear Nafrat,
Tum dimaag pe chadte ho
Main dil main utarta hu
Tum apne dangon ke dhuyein se
Mera chaand chupa lete ho
Phir bhi main kuch nahi kehta
Koshish jab do dilon ko jodne ki hoti hai
Do hazaar saal phele ki dalilein tum aage le aate ho
Samajh nahi paate hain log mujhe
Kyunki bachpan se unhe tum hi padhaye jaate ho
Jaati, Dharam, Rang, Roop aur ab toh Khaan paan (LOL)
Se baandhte ho aadmi ko aise tum
Ki wo ab insaan banne se ghabrata hai
Mere pass aane se darr jaata hai
Par koi baat nahi
Jo pal pal tum tabaah kar rahe ho
Usse pal pal main jod raha hu
Kaise?
Jab ek baccha maa ko janam deta hai
Tab main uss maa ki aakhon main bas jaata hu
Ladakpan ki naav main haule se baith jaata hu
Kabhi ‘saat phere’ aur ‘qabool hai’ main meri mahak aati hai
Toh kabhi ek chote bache ki aadhi toffee mujhse milkar
gareebi ki laar mitati hai
Toh aye dost to end it on a lighter note,
Jitne bhi tu karle sitam
Hans Hans ke sahenge hum
Yeh pyaar na hoga kam
Hai Insaaniyat ki kasam….
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Jab ‘Paise’ Ko Hua Identity Crisis

Jab ‘Paise’ ko hua identity crisis
Usne pucha khud se kya main bana hu only to fund ISIS
Toh kiya usne introspect
Aur daudaya apna capitalist dimaag
Chalaaye apne socialist haath
Aur bana diya ek flow chart.
Purpose tha mera harr transaction kar dunga fair
But now I’m synonymous with the word ‘unfair’
Seems strange. Right?
Arey sahaab yeh hi toh tanta hai,
Hum jana kahi aur chahte hain
Chale kahi aur jaate hain
Main acche din laane nikala,
Toh Panama ke panno main atak gaya
Aur Jan Dhan khaaton main jaane ki sochi,
Toh Uss daarubaaz bhagode ke saath phans gaya
Kapde bhi badal liye hazaar,
Aur bann gaya ‘2000’
Yahaan bhi ulta padd gaya daanv,
Ek taraf ‘Deshbhakt’ janta line main lagi,
Dusri taraf ‘Swadeshi’ baba ne jebein bhari
Khush ho gaye aam yeh sochkar,
Main (Paisa) yahi ruk jaunga
Par aye meri bholi janta
Phir Swizerland kaun jayega
Sorry thoda zyada ho gaya rona,
Aakhir main mujhe bass itna hai kehna
Na koi galti hai meri
Na koi galti hai teri
Galat toh woh fitrat hai
Jo palat deti harr insaan
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Waqt- Ek Makeup Artist

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Bachpan ke kit main se choti-choti aankhein nikalta hai

Aur unhe bade saleeke se fit karta hai

Gaal main hansi ke gubaare bhar deta hai

Aur aankhon main zidd ke aansu

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Jawaani ke brush se maarta hai mucchon ka pehla stroke

Aur shararti phoonsiyon se chehra lal kar deta hai

Baalon main style naam ki kanghi chala deta hai

Aur aankhon main sapno ki aag bharta hai

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

Jeevan ke interval main menopause ka chota sa dabba nikalta hai

Aur mehnat kash raaton ke sundar dhabbe de jaata hai

Peshaani par pareshaani ke kuch mote strokes banata hai

Aur ek aankh main gham toh ek aankh main khushi rang deta hai….

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai….

Phir anth main khanste khanste nikalta hai budhape ki peti,

Jhuriyaan banane ka saaman nikalta hai

Adhoore sapno aur rishton se aankhein geeli karta hai

Phir jeevan ke saat rangon ko milakar

Safed rang banata hai

Aur usse dheere dheere chadaane lagta hai

Tabhi toh uski (waqt ki) dukaan bandh hote hi

Chehra ek anokhi shanti se bhar jaata hai

Kitni khoobsurti se waqt chehre ka makeup karta hai

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Shake The Dust (My Version) 

This is for the seniors in my corporate world

Shake the dust

For the ones entrapped in the web of EMIs

Shake The Dust

Who work to please the client and not the brand

Shake the dust

This is for the girl

The Drama Queen

Shake the dust

The one for whom I have poured my heart out

But she goes back to the ones who ripped her soul

Shake The Dust

This is for every guy who wants to get in the pants of that girl

Shake the dust

This is for the uncle who steals from my wallet

Even when I give him money every time he asks for it

Shake The Dust

This is for the brother

Who has all the time to party

But is too busy to meet me

Shake the Dust

This is for everyone who bullies me

Not having a single shred of sense

Or ability to understand

What’s going on in my life

Shake the dust

Lastly, this is for the sister

Who left me pretty early

For her heavenly abode

And became a part

Of that dust….

My Inspirations

Gilaas

Excerpt from Raseedi Ticket by Amrita Pritam 

“Yeh ek wo pal tha…. Jab ghar main  toh nahi par rasoi main naani ka raj hota tha.  Sabse pehla vidroh maine uske raj main kiya tha. Dekha karti thi ki rasoi ke ek kone main teen gilaas dusre bartano se alag pade rehte the.  Yeh gilaas sirf tabhi utaare jaate the jab pitaji ke koi musalmaan dost aate the aur unhe chai ya lassi pilaani hoti thi aur uske baad  manjh dhokar phir wahi rakh diye jaate the. 

So, unn teen gilaason ke saath main bhi ek chauthe gilaas  ki tarah ril-mil gayi aur hum chaaron  naani se ladd pade.  Woh gilaas bhi baaki bartano  ko nahi chu sakte the,  maine bhi zidd pakad li ki main aur kisi bartan  main na paani piyungi, na doodh-chai. Nani unn  gilaason  ko khaali rakh sakti thi,  Lekin mujhe  bhooka ya pyaasa nahi dekh sakti  thi,  so baat pitaji tak pahunch  gayi. Pitaji ko isse pehle pata nahi tha  ki kuch gilaas iss tarah se alag rakhe jaate hain.  Unhe maloom hua,  toh mera vidroh safal ho gaya. Phir na koi bartan hindu raha,  na musalmaan.”

PS: Kaash itni himmat  mujh main bhi hoti. 

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Mirror

​Hey, Mirror 

You have been meditating in Slyvia Plath’s hall,

Now you hang up here at my bathroom wall.

Only you know that I cry,

Others just feel that my heart is so dry.

Its the first time I will have a shave,

Ahead of this I have a journey to pave.

Loyalty is both your asset and liability,

But you will never undermine my ability.

You will swallow my every emotion

That of a little boy who imitates his father,

Or of an old man whose son should take care of him rather.

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Fasal meri nahi lehrayi

Context- In the so called 100 successful days of Modi Government there are more than 4600 farmer suicides and more than 50000 suicide attempts. There are hundreds and thousands of men and women migrating to urban areas looking for jobs which are not there. This in turn increases unemployment Hope the government wakes up early. – P.Sainath

Pata hai, iss bar phir baarish nahi aayi,

Fasal meri nahi lehrayi.

Lala ka karza aur badh gaya,

Kyunki meri fasal ka har ek daana sadh gaya.

Jhagad ke apni beti se,

Maine uski bakri ko bech diya,

Aur bade sheher jaane ka bandobast kiya.

1789081

Par sheher toh lala se bhi pechida tha,

Yahaan koi nahi seedha tha.

Main roz foothpath par sota tha,

Apno ke liye rota tha.

Kaam toh idhar bhi nahi mila,

Tehsil ho ya zilla.

Ab khudkushi hi ek chaara tha,

Gaon aur Sheher ke Jhamelon main bechara tha

Par yeh samjh nahi aa raha tha sheher main marein ya gaon main,

Sheher main toh neta meri laash ko bhi bechenge,

Abhineta logon ko parllel cinema parosenge.

Kyun na parivaar ko saath lekar marein

Ab aur kya karein.

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Excerpt of Tryst With Black Money

Not long time, we made a tryst with black money, and now time comes when we shall redeem our pledge, not wholly or in full measure but very partially. (Kyunki 90% toh gold, shares aur property main phele hi converted hai)

And now at the stroke of midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will awake to stand in ATM lines, only to find out later, that there is no cash left in the machine.

A moment comes, which comes but rarely in history, when we step out to buy just a loaf of bread with only a single note Rs. 2000 in our pocket.

It is fitting that at this solemn moment, we take the pledge of dedication to the service of India and her government (tum kitne bade bhakt ho?) and totally disregard the suffering of our own children.

——-

Real Speech (Tryst With Destiny by Jawaharlal Nehru)

Long years ago we made a tryst with destiny, and now that time comes when we shall redeem our pledge, not wholly or in full measure, but very substantially. 

At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will awake to life and freedom.

 A moment comes, which comes but rarely in history, when we step out from the old to new, when an age ends, and when the soul of a nation, long suppressed, finds utterance.

It is fitting that at this solemn moment we take the pledge of dedication to the service of India and her people and to the still larger cause of humanity with some pride.

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Shower Thoughts #1

Consider your life is a novel, and you have no other choice but to be the protagonist of it. There will be subplots, plot twists, you will struggle, you will win but you shall not go down to the climax, looking back thinking, “That’s a pretty boring one”.

Make your novel, a page turner. Make everyday of your life beautiful (as cliche as it sounds). And remember only you have the power to do it.

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Ek Katra Hai Khoon Ka

Ek katra hai khoon ka,
Jo yeh shikayat karta hai,
Tum galat kar rahe ho.

Ek katra hai khoon ka,
Jo mujhse shikayat karta hai,
Tum raah bhatak gaye ho.

Ek katra hai khoon ka,
Jo aksar yeh shikayat karta hai,
Tum jaankar bhi anjaan ban rahe ho.

Ek katra hai khoon ka,
Jo bas shikayat karta hai,
Tum kitni aasaani se gumraah hote ho.

Hum toh desh ke dushman se ladne waale the,
Hum toh kranti laane waale the,
Inn chakaron main kyun pad gaye,
Humwatan ka hi lahoo bahaane tum lag gaye.

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Where the mind is full of fear

Where mind is full of fear and knowledge is just a hoax,

Where the country breaks into fragments just by Facebook posts,

Where words come out from stacks of money,

Where clear stream of reason is found in an actresses’ cleavage,

Where even editorial spaces are put on sale,

Where journalism and public relations have become synonymous,

Where Fourth Estate has become more viable business than Real Estate,

Into that Inferno of propaganda, Save my country from burning herself.

Here is a lecture by P.Sainath you have to watch-

 

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ज़िंदगी दोगली होती है।

ज़िंदगी बहुत दोगली होती है,
अकेलेपन में घबराती है,
महफ़िल में इतराती है,
तो कभी महफ़िल मैं डर जाती है,
और अकेलेपन में सुकून पाती है,
ज़िंदगी बहुत दोगली होती है।

ज़िंदगी बहुत दोगली होती है,
कभी किसी का साथ चाहती है,
तो कभी एक पल में ही उसी को खुद से फरार चाहती है,
अजनबी को देखकर इसे दया आती है,
तो कभी अपनों को देखकर भी तरस नहीं खाती है,
ज़िंदगी बहुत दोगली होती है।

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WATCH : 5 “Love” Shorts by Terribly Tiny Talkies. VOTE for your favourite

Terribly Tiny Tales – Welcome To Youtube

F.i.g.h.t C.l.u.b

Terribly Tiny Talkies by Chintan Ruparel and Anuj Gosalia is a creative initiative which brings together a diverse pool of writers to create one tweet-sized story, everyday. This time, they have gone ahead and produced 5 shorts. The theme is “love”.

5 shorts, under 5 minutes, by 5 filmmakers. El’ayichi by Devashish Makhija, R.I.P (Romance In Peace) by Shlok Sharma, The Last Day by Adhiraj Bose, Bunny by Vasan Bala, and Deuce by Chitan Ruparel. Do watch them and VOTE for your favourite one.

EL’AYICHI by Devashish Makhija, stars Nimrat Kaur, Divyendu Sharma, Vibha Chibber and Dodo! A dead but clingy husband and grieving but annoyed wife lock horns over what chai should be made today – adrak or ilayichi.

Shlok Sharma’s R.I.P (ROMANCE IN PEACE) features veterans Tom Alter and Shiv Subramaniam It’s never too late to find love!

Adhiraj Bose’s film THE LAST DAY stars Namit Das and…

View original post 102 more words

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Mumbai- An Amusement Park

Mumbai is often considered as a city but it actually has all the ingredients of an amusement park. The entry fee is generally two good trashings by workers of any extremist party. But the new management have come up with some exiciting offers to attract more customers to the already overcrowded ticket window.

*Ek UP waale pe Ek Bihari free* (Extra incentives for those who bring a child labour along).

Let me introduce you to some of the major attractions of this park :

1. Cheapest Rollercoaster Ride (BEST) – Board a BEST bus, sit on the last seat and without the hassle of buckling up, be ready for one in a lifetime experience. The same thrill, the same excitement of a rollercoaster costing 1800 at Adlabs Imagica is now available at Rs.18 (maximum). When you board this bus with your partner, you will literally see your Love in the air, when the bus kisses its own partner, the speed breaker.

Caution: This ride can give you back pain or bring back some old pains.

But this park has cure to your every pain. There are people selling Babaji Ki BOOTI selling all kinds of medicines. These wannabe Heisenbergs make more money than the normal chemists in their small vans. 

                                                                    Featured image

2. Toy Trains ( Local Trains) – These are called toy trains because of the people who travel in them. They do not consider their own lives valuable. Most of them hang on the gates despite there being enough space inside. It is the only place where some adults sleep as peacefully as newborns while others fight as fearlessly as school kids. It is mandatory to use two to three cuss words before entering in this toy train.

We can find one more baba in the advertisements on this toy train. This baba is jack of all trades. He is your general physician, psychiatrist, sexologist, singer, dancer (Basically the guy from MSG). He can be also found in the comments section of viral youtube videos.

3. Merry Go Round (AutoRickshaws) – In this ride the only merry making person is the AutoRickshaw driver himself, who goes round and round with the customer. The park also serves his purpose very well as most of the other parks have a main lane and one or two by-lanes maximum. But Mumbai has a lane, a by-lane, a by-by-lane and 23 other lanes likewise.

But the most intriguing factor about these rides is the attitude of drivers. An average Mumbai AutoRickshaw driver has an attitude that equals two SRKs with a tinge of KRK.

4. Treasure Hunts- This amusement park organizes an invisible treasure hunts to find happiness in life. To tell you a secret, the clues of this treasure hunt are generally hidden with the street vendors who sell chai, vada – pav, dosa, frankie , pani-puri,sandwiches, and of course, chinese bhel. When two MumbaiKars meet at these checkpoints, they have to interact in some way or the other (At least share a smile) to unlock the clue. The eventual happiness is the sum of these little little moments.

End of Part 1.

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Heavenly Economic Crisis

The Hindu Bhagwandom is going through a recession. There are 33 Crore Gods to cater to the fear of only 100 Crore BHAKTS. Most of the powers are in hands of very few Gods. This situation of imbalance in Demand and Supply mechanism resulted in unemployment. Most of the economic analysts passed from Kuber Institute Of Management are terming this condition as Heavenly Economic Crisis.

To break from this highly capitalistic scenario and generate new employment opportunities, The Holy Trinity – Brahma, Vishnu and Mahesh came up with some major reforms to revive the faith crisis. They are as follows:

1. Monetary reforms – The idea behind this reform is to put a highly popular extremist leader on a Dias where he can brainwash BHAKTS and encourage them to give birth to at least 3 children despite his highly backward economic conditions. This will increase the supply of BHAKTS. 

2. Disinvestment – Followers of other religions are encouraged ( Nobody said FORCED) to disinvest their faith in their own religion to become a BHAKT. ( Again I am not using the word FORCED CONVERSION).

3.  MultiDimensional Investment- BHAKTS are encouraged to invest their faith in various Gods. Brahma, Vishnu, Mahesh and their families are to solve general problems. But everyone should have a local God often called ‘ Kuldevta’ to cater to local problems.

4. Foreign Investment- Some pseudo NRI BHAKTS add a element of spirituality and team up with the same Gods to open temples in different countries. The major selling point of these temples is good quality cheap food. This reform is given great importance considering the future of globalized world.

5. Social Media Management – The spread of internet have infested the evil idea of atheism in the young minds. Some socially addicted BHAKTS are doing their bit by sharing pictures of various Gods and Goddesses on Facebook and WhatsApp. These pictures usually comes with a warning to like it and share it or your life will be ruined. Often these BHAKTS are sent on missions to damage multiplexes when movie like PK releases. 

But the root cause of this heavenly crisis is the BHAKTS themselves. They have started challenging the preconcieved notions of God and started thinking. Man becoming rational about these topics have eroded the Heavenly Economy.

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बुखार

अब तो बुखार भी रूठ कर चले जाता है,
कहता है भाई अब कोई मज़ा नहीं आता है,
तुम्हारे शरीर में अपना घर बनाने से,
तुम तो अकेले रहने लगे हो,
ना माँ है गर्म पानी की पट्टी लिए,
और ना नानी माँ बुरी नज़र उतारने के लिए।
ना पापा को जल्दी है दफ्तर से घर आने की,
तुम्हे डॉक्टर के यहाँ ले जाने की,
और ना भाई को झंझट दवाई लाने की।
अब तुम्हारे पास आकर बोर सा होता है,
अब तो ये शोर सिर्फ फ़ोन पर होता है।

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The Ladies Compartment

The maid that sweeps my house,
Was last night again beaten by her spouse.
The single mom which preapare my meals,
Seeks justice for her husband who came under some rich wheels.
The orphan girl who sells the bestseller ‘I Am Malala’,
Does not crave for the Noble Peace Prize,
But only wants a cute pink dress preferably of her size.
And the girl who sells that dress,
Aspires to wear the Miss India crown,
But is rejected everytime with a frown.
Yet when they meet in the ladies compartment,
They share a smile and try to be happy for a while.

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Every Da Vinci needs a Medici

When I try to fly like Da Vinci,
Please be my Medici.
For if you give me some tolerance,
I will build you another city like Florence.
You call me a lunatic,
I say, your brains are antique.
My mind works at a frantic pace,
Just give me my own space.
I am not a genius, just a little curious,
About things which make me furious.
And my curiosity goes beyond,
Arts, Science and Commerce.
I will not be your cliched bait,
For I am here to create and innovate.
I will not be another appointment letter,
For I am here to make peoples’ life better.

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Queens Of The Filmi Highway

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With this year coming to an end, we have witnessed some great movies which broke the stereotypes of having a male protagnist. We saw two Delhi girls coming out of their comfort zones to go on a journey of their lives. Whether it was Mahi in Highway or Rani in Queen, both explored oneself during the course of their respective journeys and emerged victorious by the end of it.
We also saw two of the most powerful documentaries namely The World Before Her and Gulabi Gang made by Nisha Pahuja and Nishtha Jain respectively. The former explores two very diverse Indias within our country. The tussle between modern and traditional values related to feminism. But at the core every Indian girl is suffering with same conflict of finding her own voice whether it is in the Miss India pageant or at a Durga Vahini Camp. The later one shows a revolution in making at the grassroot level. Gulabi Gang, a fearless army of women headed by Sampat Pal fight against the issues of gender bias, class divide and corruption. Though this story has a bollywood masala version called Gulaab Gang with Madhuri Dixit and Juhi Chawla fighting in pink saris which was  not even 10% as impactful as the documentary.
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Another notable film though short in runtime but equally hardhitting was Megha Ramaswamy’s Newborns. Story of Laxmi, an acid attack survivor turned human rights activist through the lens. A beautiful short film which questions the real meaning of beauty. All in all, it was a great year for feministic cinema wave from the land which produced gems like Mother India and Bandit Queen. Hoping to watch some more great content in 2015. image

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सच और झूठ

सच से दूर भागते हैँ हम ,
झूठ के पास जाते हैं हम।
झूठ बोलकर इतराते हैं हम,
सच बोलकर घबराते हैं हम।
हम सच से क्यों डरते हैं,
झूठ पर क्यों मरते हैं।
हर जीत सच्चाई से मिलती है,
ये पता होने के बावजूद झूठ को नहीं तजते हैं हम।
सच बोलकर नोट पर छप गए बापू,
झूठ बोलकर जेल गए ढोंगी साधू।
फिर भी सच से दूर भागते हैं हम,
झूठ का दामन ही थामते हैं हम।

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एक नन्ही रूह का पैग़ाम

आज देल्ही पब्लिक स्कूल के बच्चे के ख़्वाब में
आर्मी स्कूल, पेशावर के बच्चे की रुह आई।
उसने कहा की जिन बच्चों के पापा आर्मी मैं है,
उनको मेरी तरफ से एक पैग़ाम देना।
सियासत ने उन्हें गुमराह किया है।
उन्हें सीमा पर पता नहीं क्यों भेजा है,
असल में दहशत सीमा पर नहीं हमारे घरों में ही हो रही है।
वहाँ ये लोग ज़मीन के एक टुकड़े के लिए लड़ रहे हैं,
यहाँ हम दहशतगर्दो के हाथों मर रहे हैं।
मुझे यह समझ नहीं आता हम आपस में ही क्यों लड़ते हैं,
तालिबानी जैसे डरपोक से क्यों डरते हैं।
पेशावर हो या मुम्बई,
लाहौर हो या दिल्ली,
यह लोग उड़ाते हैं हमारी जान की खिल्ली।
बस अब बहुत हुआ,
हमें आपस में लड़ना बंद करना होगा,
साथ मिलकर इन जानवरों को काबू में करना होगा।
हैवानियत की इस बारिश से बचने के लिए,
छाते को एकता के रंगों से भरना होगा।

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School Bag

Bees saal baad jab wapas puraane ghar pahuncha toh,
Saala phir se seedhi chadte hue nakhoon par lag gayi.
Upar ki manzil par pahunchkar Maine apna kamra khola toh,
Saamne pada mera purana school bag dikha
Uski tooti hui chain se ladta raha thodi der tak phir
Nikala uss bag main se ek dhool khaya hua sapna
image Maine uss dhoondle sapne ko jab dhoya aur sukhaya,
Toh pata chala yeh toh waisa hi sapna hai jaisa maine
Apne Bete ke naye bag main dekha tha,
Aur kaha tha, Zyada hawa main mat udo.
Shayad uss waqt main yeh bhool gaya tha,
Ki usse toh mere hi sapano ke pankh lage hain
Pata nahi phir bhi kyun main usse daant raha hu
Uske inn pankhoo ko kyun kaat raha hu
Hum dono main toh ek hi sapano ka engine hai.
Faisla kiya uss din maine ki,
Bhale hi mere sapano ke engine main oiling thodi kam reh gayi,
Par uske sapano ke engine main kabhi petrol khatam nahi hone dunga.

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My Experience With BhaiZone

As I once said, Ultracuteness often lands you in a space called BhaiZone. See this 50 shades of grey generation often likes a grey character with darker shades. An average guy with lightish grey character is often left forever alone. He is nice to everyone and often mistaken as a friend. When this friend is possessive for someone, it makes things even worse as he enters the BhaiZone. Yeah..often shyness and inferiority complex is  the common characterstic for people in this zone. Actually he is not shy but he takes more time to open up with people new to him, but till then he has already entered into that zone. Boyfriends of every girl around him come and go liKe Indian Batsman on International pitches and  he stands on the other end like Rahul Dravid doing his duty all the time but not getting credit. He gives her hint  and keeps doing his own little stint. It really hurts when she takes innumerable selfies with him and send that pictures for editing and then Instagram it with #LoveYouBhai and #InstaLove ( It is compulsry). Sitcoms like The Big Bang Theory and movies like Revenge of The Nerds boosts his confidence. But when he gets into real world he has no choice but to sit with his laptop and his Half Girlfriend ( Symbol of INC). In the Decleration Of BhaiZone, Bill Gates quote- In the constant pursuit to get out of the BhaiZone, Patience is the Key, once you are rich, the ball is in your court and you will find your “True Love”.

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GOD is a novel concept.

God is a novel concept. The first invention in Artificial intelligence. A concept which goes beyond heart and mind and make its way to the SOUL. It was meant to be a life changing concept for human beings. It was meant to spread love and peace. Everything was well and good till few influential and power hungry evil scientists saw GOD as an opportunity to fulfill their greed. These evil scientists installed a red chip in the HOLY system and called it RELIGION. This red chip corrupted the whole system and deleted some default programs of love and peace and installed some new ones like hate, greed and intolerance. An additional patch was installed later which was called MONEY. The perfect recipe for evil.

These evil scientists made their own armies and lured people to join them. These power hungry douchebags started a war which helped nobody but them. They brainwashed people and infested them with fear capsules in their research labs which they call temples, churches and mosques etc. Over the years as this war has become gruesome, the money blankets under which these evil scientists secretly masturbated while exercising celibacy ( FAKE BTW!!!) is becoming more and more comforting for them and disturbing for us.

I am not against GOD. Everybody has a secret personal relationship with GOD, which each one should respect. Some people take God as a spiritual being, while others consider Him as a father figure which will inspire them in the course of their life etc, etc. See nobody should stand between you and your faith. Likewise, you cannot tamper others faith. HE is here to spread goodness and not evil. Religion is doing nothing but eroding this novel concept of God.

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Dadi Maa

Dekha Bambai ke pradushit aasman ko toh,

Bas ek tara dikha , chamkta sitara dikha.

Dekh ke uss sitare ko dadi maa ki kahani yaad aa gayi,

Unki khoobsurat aakhen yaad aa gayi.

Woh saari ki ek choti si ghitan main duniya basa leti thi,

Papa office se late ho jaaye toh unhe bhi saja deti thi.

Unki jasdooi almaari main,

Apne aap hi humaari gulak ke paise dugne ho jaate the.

Maa nahi rehti thi jab ghar pe,

Tab mithai ke dabbe apne aap khali ho jaate the.

Shayad bhagwaan tak pahunch gayi thi woh halwe ki khusboo

Jise banaate banaate dadi maa unke pass chali gayi.

Uss halwe ke swaad se dadi ne bhagwan ko bhi pata liya aur

Mere ghar ke upar waale aasmaan par apna naya ghar bana liya.

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Yaadon Ki Chutti

Yaadein ek din ki chutti par jaaye
Aur mujhe waapas chota bacha bana jaaye
Akal se thoda katcha bana jaaye
Yeh Duniya waapas ek jadoo si lage
Har Ek Phool ki khushboo bekaboo si lage
25 paise ki goli jitna sapna ho jaaye
Apna waapas apna ho jaaye
Kutta bhoke toh main bhi bhoku
Bandar naache toh main bhi naachu
Log waapas thode pagal se ho jaaye
Naak main chitti ungli galti se chale jaaye
Hamesha tapakti laar se zameen geeli ho jaaye
Yaadein ek din ki chutti par jaaye
Aur mujhe waapas chota bacha bana jaaye.

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Message from Soul

Dear Man,
Hey there, this is your soul, not your soulmate.. You idiot, your soul. Its been a long time since we last met. I think you have become so obsessed with technology and artificial connections that now you need a smartphone application to face your inner self also. I don’t blame this on you. This new technology and innovations have seduced you to be a part of this RatRace.
You should embrace the fact that I am the one who stays in this world after you leave. I really need a nice home this time, as in a body of a person who is around less two faced people and who has the time to talk with me. Yeah.. Yeah, I might sound a bit selfish here. But I know what is best for you. I am not patronising you like the other beings of the world. But for our partnership to be successful you have to listen to your inner self. YOURSELF. You are no sheep. Goddamnit. You are a Human being. You cannot follow others, you are here to lead.
So take your mirror and see eye to eye in your own eyes and say something like the old days. So I can get your message. Always remember, You are here for something great. Please don’t listen to others. Only listen to your gut feeling.
Hope to get your reply soon.

Only Yours (For the time being)
The Soul.
(I know you have become a slave of popularity. You will post this letter on WordPress to get some petty views. See.. I got you again).

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Zindagi ne mujhe meri aukaat dikha di

Zindagi ne mujhe meri aukaat dikha di,

Bhuke pait aur Ek Muskaan se ek hi jism pe mulaqaat kara di,

Ab toh paanch sitara hotel main duniyabhar ki cheezein khaate hain,

Par woh muskaan kahi chali gayi , jo udhaar ke doodh se bani maa ke haath ki kheer khakar aati thi.

Zindagi ne mujhe meri aukaat dikha di,

Nange pair aur ek hansi se ek hi jism pe mulaqaat kara di,

Ab toh morning walk bhi NIKE ke joote pehen ke karte hain,

Par woh hansi kahi chali gayi, jo khud ke phate joote seene ke baad aati thi.

Zindagi ne mujhe meri aukaat dikha di,

Phate kapdon aur ek khushi se ek hi jism pe mulaqaat kara di,

Ab toh shirt main button bhi sone ka lagaate hain,

Par woh khushi kahi chali gayi, jo maa ki phati saari ke neeche chupne main aati thi.

Zindagi ne mujhe meri aukaat dikha di.

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Nightmare and Daydream

I was a nightmare, you were a daydream
When we first met,  we just sat and chat
Then only we started to date.
I don’t know why you liked me,
And everyday Skyped me.
Ooh.. So you saw that love in my eyes,
But I was stupid,
I never got over your beauty to see the same love in your eyes.
You knew that and took advantage
I thought I am turning into a Daydream
That all the things which were happening between us were real
But then you left without saying anything
And it turned out to be another gloomy nightmare.

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If Karan Johar made Interstellar

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If Karan Johar made Interstellar, first of all, there will be a love triangle between TARS, Dr. Brand and Cooper and before getting seprated from the two, Cooper will give some courtship tips to TARS,   Kyunki Kya Pata Kal Ho Na Ho.
Professor Brand , (who will be a gayish character) will have a secret crush on Dr. Mann. While his daughter is leaving, he will say that dialogue which has now become cliche over the years , yeah.. You guessed it right, Ja Beti Ja jeele apni zindagi and that poem ‘Do not go gentle into that good night’, will run in Background (Sung by Sonu Nigam).
Ofcourse Cooper will not be able to complete the mission because Murph will have a common cold (established by one sneeze) and the next thing we see is Cooper is in a space shuttle crossing all the barriers of OuterSpace, Quantum mechanics and Relativity to find out that Murph has already reached to a Space station which is called Dharma Productions and it is currently orbiting Saturn.
But how did Murph reach to this space station…. Well for that we have to go in flashback (It’s a Karan Johar film). Just to take audience in Suspension of Disbelief, Cooper was sent to Space (aur ek love song bhi shoot ho gaya OuterSpace main). The actual plan of NASA was to organise a ‘Astronaut Of The Year’  competition which has three rounds- Space Shuttle race, Humanoid -Human dance ball and Treasure hunt. Murph wins the competition and gets Rohit Mehra’s (Not Rahul) old computer as a prize. She clicks four random keys on the keyboard , which sounds like my father’s burp *Om, Om, Om, Om* and in the next scene she is in a space ship with Jadoo and they go to a space station near Saturn. (Fuck Fifth Dimension, Black Hole, Wormhole, who needs all that when we have Jadoo). Kajol is already waiting there for his guest appearance (It’s a Karan Johar film).
Once, Cooper reaches to the train station, Murph throws a party in which she invites all the famous celebrities from different galaxies.

Happy Ending.

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Aabru, Aarzoo aur Justuju

Aurat ki aabru ko aadmi ne
apne pajame ka nada samjha hai
Jab chahe tab Khol deta hai
Aurat ki aarzoo ko aadmi ne
Apne shirt ka button samjha hai
Jab chahe tab tod deta hai
Aurat ki justuju ko aadmi ne
Apne joote ka fita samjha hai
Jab chahe tab baandh leta hai
Par pagal aadmi yeh bhul jata hai
Ki usse pajame ka nada bandhna,
shirt ka button lagaana aur joote ke fite bandhna,
ek aurat ne sikhaya tha.